[ale] [HUMOR] virus definitions

[James P. Kinney III]

The George Bush Virus - Causes your computer to keep looking for viruses
of mass destruction. 
The John Kerry Virus - Reverses every position in your computer, each 
time you turn it on. 
The Ronald Reagan Virus - Saves your data, but forgets where it is
stored. 
The Clinton Virus - Gives you a permanent Hard Drive with NO memory. 
The Al Gore Virus - Causes your computer to just keep counting and 
re-counting. 
The Bob Dole (a.k.a. Viagra) Virus - Makes a new hard drive out of an 
old floppy. 
The Lewinsky Virus - Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then 
e-mails everyone about what it did. 
The Michael Jackson Virus - Attacks only minor files. 
The Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus - Terminates some files, leaves... but 
will be back! 
The Mike Tyson Virus - Quits after two bytes. 
The Oprah Winfrey Virus - Your 200 GB hard drive shrinks to 100 GB, then
slowly expands to re-stabilize around 150 GB.
The Ellen Degeneres Virus - Disks can no longer be inserted. 
The Prozac Virus - Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor 
doesn't care. 
The Lorena Bobbitt Virus - Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch 
floppy .. then discards it through Windows. 
-- 
James P. Kinney III          \Changing the mobile computing world/
CEO & Director of Engineering \          one Linux user         /
Local Net Solutions,LLC        \           at a time.          /
770-493-8244                    \.___________________________./
http://www.localnetsolutions.com

GPG ID: 829C6CA7 James P. Kinney III (M.S. Physics)
<jkinney at localnetsolutions.com>
Fingerprint = 3C9E 6366 54FC A3FE BA4D 0659 6190 ADC3 829C 6CA7
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