[ale] (Fwd) FW: Holiday Carols! (fwd)

[Dan Newcombe]

Gotta love the MS ones :)
Happy Holidays All.

> >All,
> >
> >More Cyber Christmas songs for you to sing (quietly please).
> >
> >Enjoy,
> >
> >
> >           "Christmas" Songs
> >
> >            Happily Addicted to the Web
> >            ---------------------------
> >            (to the tune of "Winter Wonderland")
> >
> >            Doorbell rings, I'm not list'nin',
> >            From my mouth, drool is glist'nin',
> >            I'm happy--although
> >            My boss let me go--
> >            Happily addicted to the Web.
> >
> >            Unaware time is ticking,
> >            There's beard on my cheek,
> >            Same clothes for a week,
> >            Happily addicted to the Web.
> >
> >            Friends come by; they shake me,
> >            Saying, "Yo, man!
> >            Don't you know tonight's the senior prom?"
> >            With a listless shrug, I mutter, "No, man;
> >            I just discovered letterman-dot-com!"
> >
> >            I don't phone, don't send faxes,
> >            Don't go out, don't pay taxes,
> >            Who cares if someday
> >            They drag me away?
> >            I'm happily addicted to the Web!
> >------------------------------------------------------------------
> >
> >            The Bill Gates Song
> >            -------------------
> >            (to the tune of "The Christmas Song")
> >
> >            Netscape roasting on an open fire,
> >            Apple begging on its knees,
> >            Photo popping up on Time magazine,
> >            Yes, Bill Gates dreams of days like these!
> >
> >            Everybody knows he's never fully satisfied,
> >            Throws himself behind each task,
> >            World dominion is his company's goal.
> >            Well, hey, is that so much to ask?
> >
> >            He knows the world is in his sway,
> >            We'll buy whatever software he might toss our way,
> >            We'll surf his Internet, watch his TV,
> >            He'll take us anywhere we ask him--for a fee.
> >
> >            And so we're offering this simple prayer,
> >            To Bill and all his MS grunts:
> >            Since we all follow any standard you write,
> >            Make it good, please,
> >
> >            Make it good, please,
> >            Make it good, please, just once!
> >------------------------------------------------------------------
> >
> >          Microsoft
> >          ---------
> >          (to the tune of "Jingle Bells" starting with "dashing thru the
> >           snow.)
> >
> >            Nine-tenths of a gig,
> >            Biggest ever seen,
> >            God, this program's big--
> >            MS Word 15!
> >            Comes on ten CDs,
> >            And requires--damn!
> >            Word is fine, but jeez--
> >            60 megs of RAM?!
> >
> >            Oh! Microsoft, Microsoft,
> >            Bloatware all the way!
> >            I've sat here installing Word
> >            Since breakfast yesterday!
> >            Oh! Microsoft, Microsoft,
> >            Moderation, please.
> >            Guess you hadn't noticed:
> >            Four-gig drives don't grow on trees!
> >------------------------------------------------------------------
> >
> >            I'm Dreaming of a Clean System
> >            -------------------------------
> >              (to the tune of "White Christmas")
> >
> >            I'm dreaming of a clean System,
> >            Something that fits on one CD.
> >            Each component matches,
> >            Not bits and patches,
> >            Unlike 7-5-point-3.
> >
> >            I'm longing for a dream System,
> >            Small, stable, fast, and trouble-free.
> >            What we want, I think you'll agree,
> >            Is called System 6-point-oh-3!
> >------------------------------------------------------------------
> >
> >             Prove It's So!
> >            --------------
> >            (to the tune of "Let It Snow")
> >
> >            Oh, the papers say Apple's dying,
> >            But before we start good-byeing,
> >            We should call them all up and go,
> >            "Prove it's so! Prove it's so! Prove it's so!"
> >
> >            They say "Mac OS software's scarcer."
> >            We say, "Read those numbers, there, sir,
> >            Sales continued this year to grow.
> >            There ya go, there ya go, there ya go!"
> >
> >            When they tell us Win 95
> >            Made the Mac's famed advantages ebb,
> >            We'll say, "Why, then, do Macs now drive
> >            60 percent of the Web?"
> >
> >            We can win our PR reversal--
> >            Make the Mac be universal--
> >            Though we may have some years to go,
> >            Make it so, make it so, make it so!
> >------------------------------------------------------------------
> >
> 
>  -----------------End of Original Message-----------------
> 
>  -------------------------------------
> Larry Hyde
> SITA
> Senior Manager Messaging Engineering
> E-mail: larry.hyde at es.atl.sita.int
> FAX:    770/850-5390
> Voice:  770/850-5339
> 
> Date: 12/16/96
> Time: 9:28:11 AM EST
>  -------------------------------------
> 
> 
> --
> /*******************************************************************************
> *   Andrew Hackett                                   Dekalb College            *
> *   andrew at dchpux.dc.peachnet.edu                    (404)244-2256             *
> *******************************************************************************/
> 


=====================================
Carol Braun              404-244-2393
Administrative Computing Center, OIT
DeKalb College, South Campus
E-mail: carol at dchpux.dc.peachnet.edu

--
Dan Newcombe (newcombe at aa.clayton.edu) http://www.clayton.edu/home/dan/
"And all I do is miss you and the way we used to be. All I do is keep the beat
and bad company. All I do is kiss you through the bars of a rhyme."
                               -Dire Straits, "Romeo And Juliet"